Scuba Van Driver Sets New World Record!

Posted: October 9, 2013 in BCDs, Culture, Diving Equipment, driving, Media, Scuba Diving, Sport, Travel
Tags: , , , , , ,

white-van-man

In breaking Scuba Diving News, The Scuba Monkey can reveal that Instructor Bob McNobb, 43, from Gt Yarmouth, broke a new Scuba record when he drove his Scuba Diving Van loaded with equipment from the East Coast of England to Vobster Training Centre in Somerset without even once leaving the outside lane of the motorway – holding up miles of frustrated motorists.

Mr McNobb, armed with only a Mercedes Sprinter van, 3 Ginsters pasties, 2 ‘wild bean cafe’ coffees and 10 Lambert & Butler cigarettes, undertook the feat last weekend.

“It was tough. A real test of endurance staying out there in the wrong lane all that time. But I did it.” said Bob looking tired but relieved at the waterside. “I’ve been working up to this for months. Years. It started back in 2009 when I did a whole stretch of the A14 from Cambridge to Brampton Hut in the outside lane with a queue of angry motorists behind me. I was coaching my Divemaster Trainee, Steve, on how to drive like a proper scuba diving professional. I just built up my strength and endurance from there.”

Talking through his training regime, Bob said “The trick is to ensure you have enough junk food, caffeine and nicotine onboard before setting off. Preparation is key, you see. The rest is just hard work and perseverance.”

Mr McNobb’s record beats the previous champion Mike Twatty’s effort when he drove a Ford Transit from a dive centre near Watford to Guildenburgh Water near Peterborough upsetting 43 motorists and causing a multiple pile-up on the A1 northbound.

Mercedes_sprinter_2_v_sst

The Title-winning Vehicle

Mr Twatty said “Bob has a gift. It takes a real Pro to be able to unwrap a chicken tikka slice with one hand at 70mph while simulataneously lighting a fag with the other hand and weaving in front of an angry sales rep in a Renault Megane Diesel. Pure class. Credit to him. He’s a worthy champion.”

Asked if he had any “top tips” for up and coming diving professionals wanting to follow in his footsteps, Bob said “Concentrate on the basics and, as I said, ensure you have the right diet of pasties, coffee and fags. Steer clear of the Highway Code. And, personally, I find if I listen to Example, Chase and Status, Pendulum, or something equally banal, repetitive and mind-numbing, that helps to blott out the other drivers’ horns beeping and violent threats – allowing me to focus on dangling my right arm out of the window and tapping the bodywork in time with the music.”

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s